I never knew my Pappy, he died when I was only 11 years old. But from the stories I have been told by my mother and Aunt Phyllis, I wish I had. He was a loving father to them, and a loving husband to my Nana, qualities I hope that I have inherited. And I know him more through their stories about him. But God did allow me to get to know my Grandpa, and for that I am truly blessed.
My Grandpa was what I think of when I think of a grandfather. A tough act for any generation to follow. He always had time for me, and looked forward to our times together. When we used to visit on weekends, Friday nights after dinner were ours. We would go in the basement for hours and play with the trains. On a set where he had built mountains, trestles, and incorporated Plasticville, I always thought it rivaled anything I saw in the windows of department stores at Christmas. I learned the names of the train lines, where they were from and other non-important, valuable information about the trains. From his early travels cross country he would insert personal tid bits, making the rails in the basement seem real, and the Lionel train seem as big as the tales he told. I learned to go slow on the turns, and how to regulate the speeds when the terrain changed. Many a crash was prevented by his guiding me. Applying these things to my life has kept me from other crashes as well. They were times well spent.
When I was young he and I watched a movie on Walt Disney's Wonderful World of Color about a bear and her two cubs, Nakomis. Old Nakomis spent most of her life keeping her playful cubs out of trouble, and raising them in values important to other bears. The love Nakomis used to show to her two cubs was special, and my Grandpa and I shared that love. He would often come up to me and whisper in my ear something about Nakomis, and we both would smile, it was a special relationship. We shared old Nakomis. But only with each other. Old Nakomis finally died, in the movie, and I think we both cried, but the values she instilled in her cubs enabled them to go on in life. The same values that the two of us shared. There are times I miss those old Nakomis hugs, and times I still wish I had them.
I only saw my Grandpa upset once, when I was visiting on my motorcycle from New Mexico, he lived in Pennsylvania, a sport he always wanted to learn, but at 70+ was just happy to sit on. He had hitchhiked cross country when he was in his early 20's, I have a picture on my wall of Yellowstone he took, dated 1926. Perhaps that is where I get my call to the open road from. But the time I saw him upset was when I coasted my Nighthawk down from Sixth Street to the sidewalk between the houses, and a cop got in my face about no helmet. And my Grandpa got between us and defended me to the point I almost felt bad for the cop, almost. And my Grandma told me how every time he would see this poor cop, Grandpa would remind him of his responsibilities, and they didn't include harassing bikers-particularly his grandson. Old Nokomis, still taking care of her cub.
While riding yesterday I became overwhelmed by the Holy Spirit about coming to Jesus as a little child. Most of the stories we were taught reflect on our reaction to Him, but since the book is about Him, this time God showed me a different perspective, using my Grandpa as an example of God's love for us. We can go as children to him not because of who we are, but because of who He is. We are drawn to Him because of His love for us-He is love. We go in trust, just like I did to Grandpa, because He is trustworthy, no one ever explained who he was, we had a relationship, based on love. And he watched out for me, just like Jesus watches out for us. Like we would spend time together, God wants to spend time with you. He considers it precious. He wants nothing to stand in the way of our relationship, even warning not to suffer the little children-let them come, do not prevent them from being with me. He protects us, tells us parables, stories so that we can learn about life and how to live it, and is always there for us. In many ways, He is like Nakomis, and my Grandpa. And they are like Him. But just like Nakomis got old, and died, so did my Grandpa. And that left me without the hugs, ending a relationship-but only temporarily,for my Grandpa knew Jesus. And until we see Jesus in heaven, He left the Holy Spirit here to guide us. Nakomis couldn't leave anything except love and her memories, which often are not enough. My Grandpa left me memories and lessons, and love-but Jesus gave himself, and left Himself-so that we will never be alone. Or unloved, or unprotected. He loves us just as we are.
That day that Grandpa intervened with the cop, I learned a lot about Jesus. Grandpa knew all about me, yet loved me anyway. Because I was his, he protected me, getting between me and trouble. Despite the fact I had lost my license and used their address as home, he never looked at the sin, he looked at the sinner and loved me. He saw me without sin, loved me just as I am-just the way Jesus sees those who believe in Him. And when I was accused, defended me with Himself, just like Grandpa-but unto death so that I may live. All because I am His own-a child of God. Don't mess with God's kids.
I like being a child-and it is never to late to have a second childhood. I am still enjoying my first, leaning on Jesus' everlasting arms. I can come just as I am-dirty from riding, tired from life, hungry for affection, and He takes me in-just like Grandpa did, and we go into our special place together-like we did in the basement, and spend time together. A two wheeled place. A relationship based on love. He loves me because of who He is, despite what I am. Now that's love.
The last I saw of Nokomis cubs they were heading out on their own-making their own way in life, without her. She had raised them and it was time to go out on their own. And as we get older so do we. As I travel on in my life I like my privacy, but I am never alone, God is always with me. And memories of my Grandpa. And as I rode up the freeway yesterday, I was reminded things would be all right, for God was with me. I look forward to riding more miles with Him, safer than her cubs, and with the love only God can show.
I miss Grandpa, and would love just one more evening in the basement with him and the trains. I would like just one more Nakomis touch from him, but I am patient to wait. I know he would too. They await us in heaven, but for now, I am safe is His everlasting arms. Maybe that is why I never grew up, being a child has its rewards, but being a child of God has Jesus. And since I can't rest in Nakomis' arms, I am glad I have His. With those nail pierced hands holding onto me, and defending me-protecting me from life, guiding me where to go, and never leaving me alone. Three great examples God has given me of love, but the best still awaits-heaven and face to face with God.
Take my advice-never grow up. Only grow in the Lord. Make that your priority and stick to it. My Grandpa and I shared Nakomis, now we share Jesus. His love endures forever. Surely grace has its advantages. And take the advice Grandpa gave me, "be good to yourself and others." I believe quoting Jesus who said "love thy neighbor as thyself."
And I thought it was only about two guys who loved trains, and a bear who loved her cubs. Thanks Jesus.
love with compassion, and a hug from Nakomis,
Mike
matthew25biker.blogspot.com