in search of the round yon virgin

Christmas was always a big deal at our house when I was growing up.  Lots of food and presents with my Grandparents coming down to spend the night.  We had just moved into our new house in suburbia, and the thing to do was have Santa come and visit.  Not quite six, but going on 16, when the bell rang and the door opened and Santa Claus himself was there, it was a big deal.  I went along with it although I had a sneaking suspicion it wasn’t really Santa, but Mr. Howarth our next door neighbor.  I had a few things going for me, one Mr. Howarth was tall and had two different colored eyes like this Santa, he smelled of asphalt, he owned a paving company next door, and I was always looking at the dump trucks and tractors, but the dead give away was his shoes, covered with tar.  But I went along with it, until he was gone, then telling my parents my suspicions.  They thought I was so smart and clever, but I didn’t push it too far, I didn’t want to take any chances not getting the presents that Christmas meant to me.  I may have wavered in my belief in Santa, but I would cling to the concept, just in case I was wrong about him.

It was popular in school to learn about Jesus and the real Christmas story.  We never got into the background, just what the songs said, born in a manger, to a virgin, whatever that was, wondered if anyone had ever seen a round young virgin, and all about the three wise men.  Later I would learn a manger was a feeding trough, swaddling clothes were really strips used in burials, and there weren’t three wise men, no number is mentioned.  But the story of Jesus being born stuck with me, and if it meant more toys, I was willing to hang with the concept...just in case.....

But in junior high after being out till 10 pm with friends on Christmas Eve, any doubt about Santa was confirmed with a note on the door.  Seems they all went to bed early, and left me a note, stating Santa had left the presents in the closet, would I please put them under the tree.  Which also confirmed my doubt in the chimney concept, as we had no fireplace, so no chimney for him to come down.  Most likely as always Grandma and Grandpa were the Clauses, but being a Santa’s helper wasn’t so bad, after all it meant presents, so I once again clung to the concept.  Just in case....the closet was handy for him.

But it was after becoming a Christian that Christmas became real to me.  My first Christmas after being saved and moving to Albuquerque with John.  And the four of us going to California for Christmas, until Mr. Hansch died  unexpectedly, and the trip was cancelled.  The others were able to get flights at the last minute, I couldn’t, so spent my first real Christmas alone, just me and Jesus.  No tree, no presents, just a silent night and the same the next day.  But it was special to me, as the concept of Jesus being real became more real.  I saw past the toys and saw the gift God gave that day.  I never told my family as they would have worried, I will admit to missing Christmas morning and the excitement, but it was like having been one of the wise men that night.  Christmas became personal, and all doubts about him became true to me.  A dinner at Burger King on Christmas Day should have been a bummer, but I was filled with joy.  The concept of Jesus being the reason for Christmas had become real, and instead of wanting to receive gifts, I wanted to give.  Just as God did, setting the precedent of being a cheerful giver, and how it is more blessed to give than receive.  Only Jesus can do that for you...no matter how old a kid you are.

Now there are many stories, tales, legends, and philosophies about where did Santa Claus originate.  I like the one I read recently, about a man named Nick, who when he heard a family didn’t have food or the things they needed, he threw a bag of gold coins into their window one night and ran off.  Later when the town discovered it was him, the legend was born.  It wasn’t until 1934 that Santa had no personality, it was Coca Cola in an ad that gave us the Santa we know today.  Who would have thought a soft drink would be involved as a major part of who he is?  So today we give gifts at Christmas, and to many throughout the year, you see Christmas comes but once a year, Jesus Christ is in our lives daily.  Our giving reflects how God gave his only son, and we do it in love.  Yes we still have the tree, we tell the young ones about Santa, but we also tell them about Jesus.  You see Jesus is the real reason for the season.  Imagine that he never came into the world, and we would have no Christmas, no day of Christ.  Maybe when we look at it that way, it can mean more than shopping, and buying things for those we don’t like but want to impress, with money we don’t have.  Today wise men still seek him, I still haven’t found what out what a round yon virgin is, but I still cling to the concept of giving gifts.  Just in case....And if you really want to make me a believer, I’ll leave the window open on Christmas Eve.  Just in case that bag of gold is on your shopping list....

For maybe the Grinch was right, it isn’t about toys from the store, for Christmas is really much more.  At least to me.....Merry Christmas to all!  I rest my case.

love with compassion,

Mike

matthew25biker.blogspot.com

the Thursday I have to go back to work on Monday and ruin the last few days of my vacation blues

I blame Gerald.  He once told me the a secret about vacations I wish he hadn’t.   He told me that while on vacation, the Thursday before you come home is when you check out, and begin to come home a few days early.  All the worries you left behind become real, and the last four days of your trip become a preparation to be home.  A thought that has stuck with me in over 40 years of touring, no matter how long, how far or how many time zones crossed, that last Thursday on the road everything winds down and the trip is cut short.  It is when you find you over spent and under planned, how when you mentally checked out the week before leaving those things are waiting for you, and the last four days your mind is not on vacation mode.  A battle I have fought and both won and lost, the time either passes quicker as you know Monday back to work is coming, or slows to a crawl, as you don’t go or do things as planned in anticipation of being back home.  If only you could look forward to being back home as you did to starting on the ride.....

So state of mind has a lot to do with how you see your vacation.  Maybe a lesson in patience we all need, I know I did, learning the hard way.  After being in cardiac critical care for 20 days, I was excited to leave and go to rehab.  My night nurse Neil told me emotionally how to handle it, open heart surgery and new aorta and all.  All the attention I was used to getting, how I had been watched 24/7, would now come to end, and I would be just another patient.  I was ready, or thought I was, impatient to leave, but when the time came....I wish I could have stayed.  Things are different in rehab, I was the youngest at age 58, and the lack of personal care fell short as far as I was concerned.  If not for a night nurse Tomoko, I may have gone crazy, and along with the head of nutrition who rode, they fussed over me.  With the other real memory is of an old woman watching MTV every morning at six, then going back to her room.  After eight days in a coma, it is safe to say my sleeping habits were needing adjustment, not sure about hers.  But being blessed by an ever present Jesus, I went home early, to spend the rest of the 54 days in Albuquerque in a friend’s house.  With the promise of my infection treatments only lasting the balance of the six weeks.  No matter how well I was doing, that six week time frame was necessary, no matter how we begged or Theresa administered them.  To me it was like Thursday in reverse, would I ever leave Albuquerque?  I wondered if I would ever leave CCC, and when the big day came, home I went, riding in the back of a rented Camry, with a new heart, and a new outlook on life.  My traveling would change after that, and Thursdays would never be the same, I now enjoy everyday, looking forward to going and to coming back home.  I almost didn’t make it back....at least to my earthly home.  How could Gerald, a doctor himself, be some right and so wrong at the same time?

Seems we are so overwhelmed with time, or lack of it, we forget we are eternally in God’s presence.  God does not live moment to moment as we do, he is outside of time, as eternity has no beginning and has no end.  A constant right now if you will, and as fragile as the  moment may seem to us, he has it all under control.  Maybe the most important part of my life with Jesus that changed was in my prayers, as Theresa was given Isaiah 65:24, I paraphrase, “before you ask, God knows and has it all in motion.”  He doesn’t stop to wait from us, or listen to our advice, he has it all under control.  He is enthroned forever, no other God to replace him or take his place.  Yet we wander from him in times of need, even telling him how to fix the situation, when if only we had listened we would have the answer in place, along with the solution in progress.  Maybe a side of being a work in progress we never consider.  I read once where Jesus never hurried, and was never late.  I wish I could say the same....

But I have learned the most important part of prayer is listening to his answer, to letting him be God, and take care of me.  He never told us “to him who has a mouth let him speak,” but did say “to he who has an ear let him hear.”  Two ears, one mouth, can hearing be twice as important?  Or do we need two ears because we don’t listen?  Also hearing is the last sense to leave us before death.  Any comments on advice before leaving earth that are better than the words of Jesus?  So despite my impatience to get along and out, to start life over again, to finally get home, God had it all under control.  So that he would get the credit.  When you pray, do you listen, and when he answers do you give him all the credit?  He who never leaves us to fend for ourselves, is ever present, and visible via our actions and attitudes when we walk in his spirit.  God loves to hear from you, can you say the same?  If not, why waste your time in praying if you don’t want an answer?  His answer....

And yet so many well meaning people cross your path, telling you “they understand what you are going through.”  To which I began to reply, “really, explain it to me, I don’t.”  Did you ever wake up after being life flighted and have a new aorta after it disintegrated  during surgery?  If so, I would love to hear from you.  Fortunately I heard from God.....So do you ever get the Thursday I have to go back to work on Monday and ruin my last few days of vacation blues?  Maybe one last perspective from a man going home is needed.

In he Garden on Thursday Jesus knew what lay ahead, he knew his time on earth was coming to an end, and by Monday would be back home.  But first Good Friday, six hours of hell on the cross, yet his thoughts were of us, praying for us in his misery, talking to and listening to his father.  Sunday he would be home, establishing a new Sabbath, where we could all rest in him until called home to heaven.  But on Monday he was back, at the right hand of his father, seeing over the universe, and over us.  He too knows of a day when he will return for us, he just doesn’t know the time or date.  But yet he is patient that none should perish and miss him.  Is he included in your future plans?  Is he part of your future, or more importantly your right now?

Bowie once sang “time might change me, but I can’t change time.”  But you can change your perspective when giving it all to Jesus.  And you don’t have to wait till Thursday or be on vacation, he is listening right now.  Question is, are you listening right now?  The spirit is calling, to give you peace, rest, comfort, wisdom, and understanding.  At times we never thought we would leave Albuquerque for home, but he was patient.  Enjoy today, we may not have a tomorrow.   I know, so enjoy today and everyday in God’s presence.  Jesus his present to you, forever.  Where the spirit of the Lord is there is liberty.  That is where I want to be.  And if you don’t understand, let him explain.....just may change your life, here and forever.  To him who has an ear never sounded so good....

love with compassion,

Mike

matthew25biker.blogspot.com