Life is full of firsts, with each one a new adventure. When you are young,
your first two wheeler rides open up a whole new world, and suddenly the
neighbor hood seems smaller, or are you bigger? Your first day of school,
leaving your mom behind, and suddenly you are a big boy, and have a whole new
set of rules, and challenges. One event and you are so grown up. Your first
date, when someone actually shows you they care, and then that first holding of
hands, hey that wasn’t so hard after all. Then that first kiss, and a whole new
set of emotions overcomes you, you are mature! Or so your PR ego tells you.
Your first drive, your first car, and your first motorcycle-all opening up
places to go, with freedom to get there, and suddenly you have come full circle
from that first ride on your two wheeler, except now there are more roads, and
all the time in the world to ride them, in between school and work. And you
learn that the freedoms you have enjoyed via all your firsts, have come with a
price-responsibility. But you ride on, knowing that it is all worth it. But
first...
... it is your first time moving out on your own that makes the
biggest impact. For me, it was when BH and I fled Jersey for Pompano Beach, our
first place together, which really was more like a four month vacation until we
were forced to leave Florida under escort. But we had grown up, we were all of
20 now, and our real first place would happen that summer. Finding an apartment
was harder than we thought, add the fact we were young and rode motorcycles,
many no vacancies showed up. We finally found a great place on River Road in
Piscataway, and another first-changing our mailing address. With help from
friends, BH borrowed the shop van from VIP Honda, and Mrs. Brown gave us an old
sofa, end table,and a rug. We had our own beds, a table my Grandpa had
refinished, and we were styling, we just didn’t have style yet. But what we had
was our own place, with all the comforts of home, including free laundry
service, dropped off weekly to our mothers, some habits die harder than others.
But we had our first place, our first garage, and many unforgettable moments,
and memories. Free to do whatever we wanted, hoping not to get caught,
hopefully we had learned our lesson in Florida.
For months Doug has been telling how his two sons were looking
to buy a house, much harder than shopping for a new car. There are loans, loan
officers, escrows, escrow thieves, and more paperwork to get in than to get
out. But finally they have a place of their own, and be it ever so humble, they
now know there is no place like home. And as the new wears off via new firsts,
they have had the joy of the first night spent there, showing it off to friends,
and the housewarming parties to follow. But other firsts such as the first
payment, first utilities due, first grocery trip, and the first major
repair-hopefully a long way off await them. All the comforts of home, with all
the responsibilities of being a homeowner. Without Mom or Dad to influence
their decisions-it is their house now. And priorities change...
So as Doug was telling about their new home, and two less mouths
to feed at home, he told of how he gave them a new refrigerator, and washer and
dryer for a house warming gift. Using the money he could have spent on a
motorcycle and helping out his sons. Typical Doug as far as I could tell, doing
for others, and being blessed. And setting an example for his sons to follow.
And as he sits back and is proud of his sons, I am reminded of another Father
who loves His son, and gave Him to and for us. He describes Him as “well done
my good and faithful servant,” and what greater compliment can a father show
than to love his sons, and daughters. To help and encourage them, to get them
off to a good start, knowing that the values they have instilled in them over
the years were not always visible, but were always there. And will be there
when called upon. Too many times I encounter men who were given ultimatums,
“you are out at 18, on your own,” and the kids suffer for it, when a loving
guiding hand could have prevented a saga of coulda, shoulda, and woulda. Just
because they have persevered the attitude is “I did it, so will they.” A sharp
push out of the nest, instead of a loving hand to guide. Doug’s example showed
that loving, guiding hand.
Last night at our Tuesday night Dustin Arms Bible study, two men
were convinced God punishes them for their sins. They live their lives never
seeing a god who sent His Son to die while we were yet sinners, and never fully
enjoy the joy of Jesus. Bad teaching, from false teachers, who espouse Jesus,
but add “you must do this,” or “you will lose your salvation if God catches you
screwing up.” Both lies, not the Jesus I know or the Jesus of the Bible. He is
love, your sin finds you out, He forgives it and forgets it. Now, will you?
Will they? It is your choice.
Go back to the fist time you met Jesus-the all time first
first. The best, on which all other decisions would come to be based. Did He
chastise you, or did He welcome you with open arms, hands open to see the
wounds, so there would be no doubt who He is and what He has done? When we
changed our eternal address from hell to heaven, was there rejoicing, or a new
set of rules? Would rules keep you there, or was it all about grace? Or did
you find love, peace, and forgiveness, things found nowhere else but in Christ?
Too many rules, they only become rules when you break them. It is easier to
live in love, than in fear. Perfect love casts out all fear. We punish
ourselves, it is called pride. Get over it!
A washer and dryer may not have been important to them while at
home, now they find out how important they are. How cold milk with Oreos is
much better. How food in the fridge gives a sense of security, and how
sometimes fathers know things, and do them at just the right time. Sounds lke
God, or a gift from Him. When they needed Doug he was there, and he will be
again when needed. A Fathers love is like that. But only because of Jesus, who
loved us first, so we can love others. To quote Pete Maravich “money can buy a
fine dog, but only love will make it wag its tail,” I would like to add “money
will buy a fine house, but only love will make it a home.” But never forget
“money may buy a fine religion, only Jesus makes it a relationship.” A father
and a son...examples to live by. You never forget your first love.
love with compassion,
Mike
matthew25biker.blogspot.com