Monday, January 5, 2015

the one your mother warned you about









Girls like bad boys.  So do other boys, who both grow up into men and women.  I have given up trying to figure it out, maybe one great lesson in the road of life.  But true it is, we tend to flock to bad boys and girls.  Maybe it is like the bumper sticker says, “good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere else.”  And although our perception of bad has gotten increasingly worse, bad is still bad, and good will eventually win out over it. But not without the good having casualties, and many sustaining life changing injuries.  And it was out of these bad that I came before I was saved.  Sadly too many of my friends didn’t, or have the scars to prove they were there, while others just got grazed by standing too close, singed but not burned.  We were all attracted to the bad boys in life, and I was one that they were attracted to.
Now it is not important to list my before Christ sins, but to know I went against him at every turn.  From outlaw biker friends to drug dealers, to hookers, to criminals, these were my friends.  Which quickly became wary of me when I got saved.  And it was my past that I escaped from, but still carried with me when I moved west at age 21, riding my R90S.  Motorcycles, or more precisely those who rode were considered outlaws, bad guys, or those type your mother warned you about.  But mostly we were about riding fast and having fun, but with perception being the better part of truth, even 40 years ago, I was considered bad.  Despite my salvation, despite my walk with Christ, two wheels may have moved my soul, but they also painted me as bad.  Which may have been a factor in being asked to help with the teens under Pastor Hyde.  They listened to me, they liked my stories, and my testimony.  I had been a bad boy, they had been raised in church, and mostly knew the “thou shalt not” gospel those outside the church thought was Christianity.  But they were bad on their own level, more curious than rebellious, and needed guidance.  So they chose me, to some a mistake, but to the teens a bad boy who knew, who was street wise, and who rode.  Who would attend church, then get on my bike parked outside the front door.  Good church types drove sedans, I rode.  And my audience wanted to hear more about it, it was up to the Holy Spirit to turn what was once bad into good.  No wonder God stays up nights listening to our prayers.....
But the youth group grew, we grew closer together, and some even grew closer to God.  Amazing.  But although I was only 6-7 years older, I was still an adult in their eyes, just a cool one.  One they could trust.   I listened and advised on dating, pretty much do as I say, not as I did.  Same with drugs, alcohol, riding fast, and listening to authority.  I had changed, and thought maybe I was done, at least compared to my new audience.  But then I fell in love....and it all changed.  And an afternoon visit from Pastor Hyde enlightened me.  I loved him, he was cool, trusted me in the position I was in, with his two daughters both part of my youth group.  Who knows how many words I spoke were repeated at home to raised eyebrows, but he loved and respected me, and I wanted to please him, I respected him also.  But with a new girlfriend, who became my wife, the playing field had changed.  The old me was still the old me, the new me was different.  And although I was in denial, Pastor Hyde was right.  As he always was.  He told me that in marriage I would want to be with my wife and not with the youth group.  So of course I argued, the many years of “I’ll show you I’ll be stupid” still evident.  He even advised me to join with other young couples, as I would feel more comfortable around them, we he really meant.  Theresa and I, we were the we.  I wasn’t a factor anymore.  And soon the youth group, the one I was so much apart of, the kids who used to come by my apartment, who gave me advice on dating, seemed the younger girls wanted me to wait until they were older, not realizing I would be older too.  My relationship with them was changing, I still loved them and was in charge, but now any excuse to not go and be with Theresa worked.  Pastor Hyde was right, I wanted to be with my own kind, my wife.  And so reluctantly I resigned, knowing it was the right thing to do.  But leaving a lasting impression on the youth group at Chelwood Park Foursquare Church.  And them on me....we both had changed, and were changing.  It was now someone else’s turn, I had a family.  But was still a part of theirs.
It seems that Jesus was and is attracted to bad boys and girls.  In the book of Mark 2, we find him at a going away party for Levi, a tax collector, who had been saved.  The party was all tax collectors, the despised of their time, sinners, and others despised by the citizens.  And Jesus sat right among them.  Much to the chagrin of the Pharisees, who took note, and asked his disciples “doesn’t he know who these outcasts are?”  And he did know, that was why he was with them.  Jesus knew who and what they were, and loved them anyway.  The Pharisees not knowing they were just as sick, or even more so in their prejudices.  Jesus was hanging out, eating and drinking with sick men, but where else would you expect a doctor to be than with the sick? 
Jesus makes himself available to the sick and hurting, to the sinners.  To all bad boys.  He showed how when people are in a bad situation and need God, he is among them.  No prejudices here, he showed the Pharisees also that if you have no desire to be helped you cannot be helped.  A lesson to all of us, good or bad.  Church folk or biker type.  He knew they wouldn’t listen, he understood their prejudices, and their lack of understanding of him.  He put himself where the greatest need was, and where it would be received.  He put himself where there were those open to his help.  The same offer was extended to the Pharisees, only they were more interested in prejudices than people.  How they looked, what others would say.  Bound by law, they missed grace.  They missed Jesus and all his blessings.  He showed them and us to love not based on appearance, but on who the person is, and love no matter what.  Good advice, and my youth group was that group.  And it was a few years later, married with kids that I was reminded how much an impact I had made. 
Brian and his sister were part of the youth group, she was a flirt, pretty, and growing up too fast.  My firm advice, and background gave gravity to my words, and she took my advice.  The advice God had given me for her.  I only learned this one afternoon running into Brian, who now was married and had a family of his own.  He told me how the group had grown under my direction, rather despite my direction, and the words and love I had put into them guided many today.  They were good kids, in need of direction, and Pastor Hyde knew it, and knew I was the one.  Yet he also knew when it was time for me to move on, for another to step in.  And today many like Brian have stepped into the positions abandoned like me and others, being guided by Jesus, led by his spirit.  I had been a despised person, only in Jesus had I changed, and am still changing today.  A work in progress....
Jesus is the hope that all us bad boys are looking for.  He is the one who will stay by us, not abandon us, and love us as we are.  Or were.  As Christians we need to recognize this and live it daily.  To look past appearances and prejudices, to love from the heart, not from the reputation.  Let God sweep away all your preconceived prejudices today, and enjoy the fullness of Christ in your life.  Jesus is open to all who let him in, and let him help.  For the rest of you, Jesus knows your hearts too.  And loves you just as much.  The man who turned water into wine can change whiners into people, and use them to change others lives.  It takes the spirit, and a willingness to follow it.  For me it was Pastor Hyde who knew my past, but saw my potential.  If only I could let that group know how much they meant to me....I can hear the stories now being told to their kids, or grandkids.  “There was this biker from Jersey who Jesus saved....” And the story continues...where are you in it?
love with compassion,
Mike
matthew25biker.blogspot.com