if I never owned a motorcycle

“Well I never,” shouted my yuppie date, waving her Gucci bag in her $200 custom denim jeans, as she found no amusement at all in the chain lube that had found its way on them.  “Well maybe you should,” was the best answer I could come up with.  How many times are you confronted by someone who knows more than you do, which insults us who do, only to find what a complete idiot they really are?  And the more they talk, the stupider they get?  Pick a subject, and you can find them to be an equal opportunity ignoramus, with some holding a doctorate in stupid.  So looking back, what made her think her hair wouldn’t get helmet head?  What made her think high heels while riding wouldn’t be a problem?  What made her think chain lube would also lube anything else it came in contact with?  And what made me think about taking her for a ride in the first place?  And from that day forward, I can only imagine the horrible stories she told of her coming close to fashion death, the injured pride of her precious denim, and having to hold her Gucci bag with both hands, while trying to hang on for dear life.  All before leaving the parking lot, where we decided, actually where she decided to meet, so her friends wouldn’t see her on a motorcycle.  And I learned how quickly a pretty face could turn so undesirable.  And how the true inner beauty of a woman shines from inside her helmet. 

When dating over 37 years ago, I was more influenced by the look rather than whether she rode, which made for many one night dates.  No riding, I lost interest, and many times when asking “Do you ride?” before asking her out prevented from spending big bucks on dinner when it could be used for tires, Castrol, and or making the payment on my new ride.  But in the rare occasions that beauty won out over the beast, when she met other women who rode, they felt out of place.  She had been to many of the places they had, only in an airplane, shuttled to the hotel by taxi, and then escorted on group tours.  And never could communicate well with them, they had been there too, and seen the beauty of the road, had been greeted by fresh air, and eaten places other than hotel dining rooms.  And they had known how truly rewarding a hot bath is after a day of riding, to soothe the bones from miles of adventure, rather than from miles of being cramped on a 737.  They had missed the fun of checking their luggage, then retrieving it, hoping it made it with them.  They had missed the fun of “guess what we’re having for lunch?” and were forced to eat a local favorite, at a local favorite hangout, meeting others and swapping stories.  Her stories of the day told of things seen, people met, and places planned for tomorrow, they both had that in common, only one would find adventure, the other a busy schedule.  One inside, the other far from it.  So I got more careful in my dating choices...”so what do you ride?” came up more often in the conversation.

My first date with Theresa 37 years ago, actually our first night together, we spent riding on my R100S.  Staying up until 6 in the morning, and knowing this was the girl for me.  And to this day neither one of us has never wavered from it.  We have ridden in 46 states together, Canada too, and I cannot imagine life without her.  And riding has made our marriage stronger.  On one Torches Across America ride, I was interviewed by a young reporter in Oklahoma City about my wife and I riding.  She told me her husband did, and she didn’t, until a marriage counselor told her to.  And that it was a great thing for a marriage, and keep them close. And with a great big smile on her face admitted it did, it has, and it does.  They ride everywhere together, and have seen more, done more, and had more fun and adventures together riding.  She may have looked yuppie on TV, but while buddy seat sitting she was a motorcyclist all the way.  And I completely concur with that, motorcycling has made my marriage greater, more fun, more exciting, and taken us places that tour groups have never heard of.  We have struggled in 100+ degree weather, through torrential rain, through lost cameras, and running out of gas.  But in all things we grew stronger, I grew smarter, and we still look forward to riding the next weekend.  Or week, or for the month whenever we can.  Life on two wheels had brought us together, kept us together, and so we continue to ride together.  And believe me men, there is nothing like having your best friend and riding partner your wife.  And for those that are dating, if she doesn’t ride, won’t try it, or even think it’s cool, she is not worth the dinner date you have in mind.  Too many men have suffered through marrying a pretty face who doesn’t ride, and watched as his bike became a bench for her junk in his garage.  And finally sold...breaking his heart, with a longing to ride even more every time he hears a motorcycle go by.  And he is only left to wonder what if?, he had married a woman who rode, who shared his interests as much as he shared hers.

We are told to not be unequally yoked in scripture.  For what do both darkness and light have in common?  I have known too many couples over the years where one is saved, the other not, and are miserable.  After having a great time in church, she goes home and cannot share it with her husband, and something will always be missing in their relationship.  She will never be loved like she wants, they are unequally yoked.  Just as bad are the women who make church their highest priority, shutting out their husbands, and making them feel not as holy.  She might as well not be married, as she too will never see the blessings of having a strong husband in the Lord.  And even sadder is the woman who is married to the man who thinks he is the spiritual leader in his home, as he should be, but falls short, and they both make excuses for their sin.  It doesn’t have to be that way, yet many refuse to listen to God’s word, thinking they know better.  And suffer for it.  Just because she goes to church doesn’t make her a Christian, just like a leather jacket and a helmet don’t make you a motorcyclist.  It takes Jesus to be a Christian, without him you are nothing, he tells us you are either for him or against him.  Not for means against, not I’m thinking, or considering.  No gray areas with Jesus, let your yes be yes, and your no be no.  Your maybe is really a no.  Consider that in your relationship with him, and also when dating.  And of course riding.

After an hour a bad seat can ruin the day.  A bad marriage can ruin a life.  In both cases it takes getting to know the method you choose to travel.  I choose to travel with Jesus, and for 36+ years with Theresa the trips only get better.  Yes there are some bad seats, the America ride yesterday is still reminding us both, but we learn, and the Tiger comes home tomorrow.  And I have found that when I consider her more for the ride, when I put her comfort and well being first, it makes for a better ride.  Showing off at 120 mph doesn’t impress every woman you meet.  So put her first, just as you put Jesus first.  And when you do, you see things through his eyes, and you find love doesn’t demand its own way, but has a way all its own for both.  Together in church, together in prayer, together in riding. 
Together.  Or twogether, with Jesus threegether is the best.  After Jesus, your marriage is the best relationship you will ever have.  Putting him first will make you love her more, be a better husband, and her a better wife.  When it all comes together and you ride...the best is here and still yet to come.  If I never owned a motorcycle I would have missed out on life.  If I never met Theresa I would have missed out on marital bliss.  And if I never knew Jesus I would miss out on heaven.  Yet I have been blessed by all three, and I can tell you, Jesus, Theresa, and motorcycles, it just don’t get any better.  Some may brag “they never,”  I can say I do.  If helmet head is your description of beauty, you know just what I mean.  Denim, leather, and the smell of chain lube....let the romance begin.

love with compassion,

Mike

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